Thursday, 18 August 2016

 My Escapisms

Hi, people. Sometimes when I'm sitting in the car and my favourite song is playing on the radio I stare out of the window and I imagine my self somewhere else, somewhere better, where I could be anyone and do anything, where I could pursue my dreams, and succeed without having to taste failure.A place where I  was god, but I didn't know it. Does this ever happen to you, reader? I actually get joy from these escapisms, and when the car ride stops so does the joy. I'm jerked back into reality where I'm just a normal boy, living with absolutely normal parents and having a normal life. The funny thing is that, I can't go into my escapisms anywhere else but when I'm on the backseat of a car.
I find this irritating as we only take short trips in the car and so my escapisms don't last long.

I understand that reality is much more important than some silly place in my mind and I should work towards making my escapisms a reality, but it's just too hard to do so. I'm just a child and I have dreams of achieving so much, but I'm strapped to a rock (metaphorically, of course) because of my laziness. They say that the first step to solve a problem is to know what the problem is. I know my flaw is laziness, but I'm too lazy to fix it. Its a vicious circle, one that is nearly impossible to overcome. But I try, and I fail, and I keep trying to break through my godforsaken fear of work.

But my escapisms have given me something much more than reality can ever give me. It is sort of like a super power. I see this world differently, not from my own eyes but the from the point of view of others. Just by paying attention to little details about a person, seeing what he sees , noticing what he does, I learn so much about them. It enables me to understand them, to know them, to predict their actions and to manipulate them. Manipulation sounds like a bad thing to do to a person, and it is, but in certain conditions I'm forced to.

Other people see me as a smart, yet introverted person. They think I'm a nerd or a geek and they try to pick fights with me and try to insult me but they themselves end up beaten or insulted. I'm not a loner either, I've got a quite a few friends, whom I like. Others see me as completely normal but I see them for what they are and for what they stand for in this world, and it's all because of my escapisms.

So, what exactly happens in my escapisms? Well it's hard to explain, but you know that anime, Sword Art Online? In that anime they use a headset to send the main character's consciousness into a virtual world. But for me the virtual world is created by my brain. Everyone that I know that world has their own unique personality, every problem that I face in that world has a unique solution. What a computer would need hundreds of gigabytes worth of RAM to do my brain does without any strain.

Escapism isn't a bad thing, as long as you can understand what is reality and what is a dream, and as long as you work towards those dreams. I would like to conclude this post with a quote by JRR Tolkien:  " the only people who inveigh against escape are jailers."

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